Love knows no distance

A friend of mine shared this story written by an author unknown. I found myself crying over the words, because they hit so close to home. There are moments of this life that are a beautiful blessing, and then there are the ones that make you fall to your knees and pray like you have never prayed before. But there is always the underlying similarity and that is the man that is wearing that uniform and the promise that is written within the love for each other.... just prepare to cry when you read this, grab a box of tissues!

 Military Man's Promise:
I cannot promise you every night of my life. I cannot promise to be beside you for every difficult moment, every trial, and every hardship. In truth, I can promise you that I will not be with you for most. I will leave you at inconvenient times. Any special date to us may be tainted with the anniversary of the death of one of my friends. I will ask you to take over whatever life we have built together for months and years at a time. And I will then crash back into that life that you have used your sweat, your tears and your heartache to keep together, and try to take it back as I knew it before. I will shut you out at times because it will be the best way for me to hold it together at that moment. I will lie to you. I will tell you I don't know things when I do. I will not always tell you where I am going, when I will be back, or who I am with. I may not call you for weeks and months and you will not be able to call me. You will ask questions that I won't answer. You will know answers to questions that you will hope you never need. I will share things with my brothers that you will never understand. They will know things about me that you never will. They will be a support to me in some things that you cannot be. I will miss birthdays. I will miss anniversaries. I may need time to process things that seem natural to everyone else. It will seem that someone - or something - will always take precedence over you. You may lose me long before you ever thought possible. I will uproot you and ask you to re-establish our family anywhere in the world, in any season, at any time - over and over again. Sand and mud will be tracked through your halls from the boots I am too tired to take off. I will leave you when you beg me not to. I will stand at attention while you cry beside me. I will not turn my head and I will walk away. I will knowingly break your heart. And I will do it again - and again. I cannot promise you all of me. I cannot promise you much of anything. But if you will have me, I can promise that as I march away from you, it is not without sharing your heartache. I promise you that every time I break your heart I will be breaking mine. Every time that I cannot answer you I will be protecting you. Whenever you want to call and you have no number to dial, I will be wanting to do the same. I will protect everything that we have created together with every fiber of my being while you do the same back at home. I will honor you in everything - every moment that we are apart and every moment that I am with you. I will fight harder and push further knowing that I do so for you. And I will carry you with me in everything, until my sandy boots once again sit just inside our door. -author unknown

 There is never a moment that I don't miss those boots laying in the middle of our living room floor, or the socks that don't quite make it to the laundry basket.  The uniform that seems to always fall in the same spot of the bedroom floor.... I will simply put the boots by the door, pick up the socks on my way to the laundry room and hang up the uniform. Because if I am doing those things, it means I finally have you home in my arms!

Finding simplicity in a not so simple life... Trusting in His timing.

I am absolutely in love with this Fall weather... it gives me so much comfort and peace of mind.

I have been visiting family for the past month and it has been all I could hope for and more. Rick and I are simply and wonderfully blessed with the most loving families! These past few months wouldn't have been possible for us if it wasn't for them and their unfailing love for the both of us as individuals and as a couple. I am thankful to have the support we have, and the freedom to be completely vulnerable with them when things don't go exactly as they should... that is where the title of this post comes from, finding simplicity in a not so simple life.

As an army wife you are told to prepare your heart and mind for 365 days of separation from your husband. And to be honest, there isn't really anyway to do that you just find a way. There are times when you break, and there are times when you rise up and find  the strength to be as strong as you can. My strength has come solely from my Faith, I am a strong believer that He will get us through the trials of this lifetime. In the 4 months that we have already knocked off the deployment calendar, we have encountered many bumps in the road. They are tests of our willingness to be completely bare and open to serving His people. I believe God put Rick and I exactly where He wanted/needed us to be. Both as a couple and as individuals. We have faced many tragedy's throughout this time and it has brought us to the point that we rely on our Faith and the power of prayer to know the right words to say or actions to give. Rick and I have been reading Crazy Love by: Francis Chan, and it has really opened our eyes about what our Faith is and what it should be. One of my favorite quotes fits well in this post: "God has allowed hard times in life so we can show the world that our God is great and that knowing Him brings peace and joy to us, even when life gets tough." What an amazing promise we have in Him.

In a simple life there would be a reason every time someone asked why... From the military wife saying her goodbyes: Why does my husband have to leave for a year? From the parents who get the unbearable news: Why do babies die after only moments on this earth? From the women who wants so badly to be a mom: Why can't I have children?.... but the answer to all those question, though not always simple, is simply Faith in God's timing. I used to complain and live very bitterly about the fact that we have tried and not succeeded 3 times to have a baby. I have had my moments of falling to my face in tears crying out to God with all that I am, and I have had my moments of just complete and utter bitterness towards those who have been blessed. Then God put Rick and I in the place we are at in this very moment, and I was able to be silent in the fact that I am not the only one that struggles with this very dream. I was told by one of the lady's in my chat group, that if having a child was simple it wouldn't be as beautiful of a miracle. We don't always know why God chooses us to carry the child that will not make it in this world. Or to be the one that struggles for years to conceive that one miracle, but he did and we can spend our whole life asking why or we can keep trusting in His timing even through the pain and struggle of each situation. God is good in the good times and God is still good in the bad times.

On a happier note... Rick got some really amazing news, he is coming home early!! Now if you remember that as an army wife you prepare for 365 days, you live that day in and day out. So when you get the news that they are coming home almost 5 months early, you will find that you are very hesitant to become to overly excited! Don't get me wrong, I am beyond ready for that man to come home for good =) but I find myself still holding back because the military has a way of changing its mind in drop of a dime... so much to look forward to in the next few months, I finally have a count down calendar that doesn't make me cringe. Looking forward to finding us a place to live and making it a home!

Love you ALL!
Em